Ditch Perfectionism for Self-Compassion: Being Kind to You
Updated: March 2025
Self-love isn’t about reaching a final destination, it’s about the journey of patience, practice, and compassion. It’s about being kind to yourself on the good days and the bad.
Your journey is full of ups and downs- days where you feel great and others where insecurities creep in. And that’s okay. The journey of self-love isn’t linear, and learning to accept and love yourself is an ongoing process that takes time and practice.
Shifting your perspective and how you speak to yourself are some of the most powerful things you can do in your self-love journey. Learning that you’re going to make mistakes and have ups and downs without being too hard on yourself.
Rather than being your own worst critic, practice self-compassion. Self-criticism will only hold you back, and treating yourself with kindness will allow you to grow. Speak to yourself the same way you would with a loved one, and allow yourself the same level of understanding and encouragement.
It can be easy to forget that our bodies change throughout our lives, and that they’re supposed to. Sometimes these changes are to be expected, and other times they’re not. All changes can be really challenging.
But no matter the change, your body is worthy of care and respect, not just for the way it looks, but for everything it allows you to do. It’s never going to be “perfect,” and it’s not supposed to be. Self-love isn’t about being flawless- it’s about making space for yourself to grow, change, and thrive.
Celebrate all the things that you ARE instead of focusing on “perfection” and the things you are not. Take the time to appreciate what your body gives you every day, the resilience of your mind, and all the things that make you, you.
How to Practice Self-Compassion:
Speak to yourself with kindness - Pay attention to the ways that you speak to yourself. If you wouldn’t say it to a loved one, don’t say it to yourself! You deserve kindness and respect. Replace self-criticism with words of encouragement.
Don’t aim for perfection - Perfection isn’t the goal of self-love, growth is. Instead of being hard on yourself for mistakes, look at them as opportunities to learn and grow.
Listen to what your body needs - Rest when you’re tired, fuel your body with food when you’re hungry, and move in ways that make you feel good. Your body will tell you what it needs if you listen!
Let go of unrealistic expectations - Everything about you changes over time. Societal pressures make us think we have to fit in an unattainable box to be happy and worthy of love, but don’t let it fool you. Instead of trying to fit in that box, appreciate where your are in every phase of life.
Don’t compare yourself to others - No two journeys are the same, and neither are bodies. Isn’t it amazing? Your life and your body are uniquely yours, and that deserves to be celebrated.
Practice self-compassion and gratitude - Give yourself patience and understanding, and acknowledge all of your efforts, big and small. Set aside time everyday to appreciate something about yourself and your life.
At White Pine Center for Healing, we believe that everyone deserves to feel at home in their body and to have access to the resources they need to achieve that. You are not alone in this journey. Whether it’s through support, education, or advocacy, we’re here to walk alongside you.
Need extra support? Visit our Helplines and Resources page to talk to someone today.
